Mean Girl

They say that little girls are made with sugar and spice and everything nice, but somewhere along the line some change from such delightful ingredients. I’m not sure how some became a mean girl, but I do know how I became one. It was nothing that was taught to me by any member of my family, but yet the company I kept as a child. Unbeknownst to me I was being slowly altered into something that at one point in life I couldn’t recognize as myself. My attitude and ego was not of anything my parents raised me to be. For years I was blinded by the fact that this was truly what I had become to be. I believe the true wake up call to it was the year I brought my house. I’ve always been one who was a giver and always tried to make everyone happy, but I began to notice that those around me didn’t always express the same attitudes or feeling I held in my heart. You see your heart has a way of telling you who you actually are insider. No matter how much you try to mask it with hurt, anger and bitterness it still holds true to the person you really are. I’ve always been one to hold a great deal of things inside until I get to the point that I can no longer take it anymore. I guess you can say I finally got to the point where that was the straw that broke the camel’s back. In the midst of my anger God began to show me everything others had tried to reveal to me for years. It was as if the blinders were off and I could see everything so clear. I think the best way to describe it was imagine you’re a beautiful swan and you look in the mirror and you see dirty clothes draped on you like a homeless person. To the eyes you stank and it gave off an aroma that was not pleasing to not only God, but those around you. I had become my worst nightmare. I allowed God to peel away the layers which had been thrown on me for years and as I began to get down to my heart and I could see that it wasn’t filled with evil and despair. The best way to explain the transformation was as if I had received a new heart transplant. Everything felt new. In the process of shedding off the layers of clothing I began to shed off those who had put these burdens and curses upon my life. It was at that moment that I realized that things that have happened to others in their life will be placed upon yours if you allow it. Don’t allow the curse and baggage of others to transform you into something God never intended you to be. It is never too late for a transformation from God. All you have to do is have a willing heart and a true desire to change and I’m a living witness he can do exactly that.